Drinkin’ The Retcon Punch: Issue 2
I Could Be a Skrull - But Then So Could You
That, in a green nutshell with a misshapen chin, is why I’m looking forward to Marvel Comics Secret Invasion crossover. According to Marvel writers the Skrulls have been planning this for years, slowly using their shapeshifting powers to work their way into Earth’s most strategic locales. The whole allure of changeling characters, a sci-fi staple, is that they could be anyone and anywhere. Yes, it’s been done before and that’s because when done well it works brilliantly.
My favorite shapeshifters of all-time were the Changelings from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Those guys had it all. They could rest in liquid form, which for some reason just looks way more restful than “solid” sleeping. They had genetically-enhanced warrior slaves in the Jem’ Hadar, and the Changelings even kept them in check by hooking them on drugs. And we all know nobody fights harder than a crackhead!
The Skrulls are definitely up there though. In a classic storyline from the 60s, Mr. Fantastic turned some Skrulls into cows so they could “live out their lives in peace.” That was a classic passive-aggressive turn for our favorite absent-minded professor. What cow outside of India has a peaceful life? People in most of the world are just waiting to turn you into a tasty burger! Or worse, one from White Castle.
That storyline has been a running gag for a friend of mine who often signs off the phone by telling me he’s “going to get some Skrull.” I’m pretty sure turning a prisoner into your planet’s primary food source violates the Geneva Convention, constitutional provision against cruel and unusual punishment and God knows how many restaurant health regulations. The Fantastic Four could be the true cause of Mad Cow disease. It’s no wonder the federal government made these superpowered miscreants register their powers during Civil War.
I should add that all my excitement for this storyline will end if the Skrulls realize the error of their ways and surrender at the end of Secret Invasion.
Tags: Fantastic Four, Marvel Comics, Secret Invasion, Skrulls, Star Trek: Deep Space NineRelated Stories
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